Fairy Weeks

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My husband Rodney and I own and operate a transportation and cremation service for funeral homes. I have buried and transported many families’ loved ones who have died from cancer. I realized that my family, close friends and I hadn’t yet experienced it and I didn’t really know much about cancer. Cancer was not in my family history, therefore, I believed that my risk was very low.

While I sat waiting for my mammogram on Wednesday, March 1, 2000, I read once again the American Cancer Society’s risk factors. The only one on the list that I matched was: over the age of forty.

My doctors and I had known that I had an abnormality in the upper quadrant of my right breast since September 1988. Then in April 1992, my doctor’s report called it a thickening that we needed to check again in six months. (I did not remember or realize how long ago my first finding was until I was writing this story today.) Again, we believed it would be okay. We all agreed since I didn’t have any family history, had never smoked, etc. that this spot was okay. I felt comfortable with this decision and that I could live with this spot in my breast.

I had received a hug from a dear friend at his retirement party. At that time a stinging pain shot through my breast. My family doctor told me while he was giving me my physical exam that he did feel something different than he had felt before this day. When I made my appointment, I was told that there was not an opening for a mammogram for about eight weeks. I thought that if my doctor wanted me to have a mammogram they would make room for me in the schedule. His nurse told me later that she had trouble getting me in and how I was so lucky that two ladies had not shown up for their mammograms. I was unaware that God was opening doors for me and guiding me down a new road in my life.

My doctor told Rodney and I that the biopsy was malignant and asked if we would see a surgeon in a few hours. At that appointment, I knew that the mammogram was not good when the surgeon explained the large tumor (4 to 6 cm.) with satellites and the possible other tumors in my lymph nodes.

I just could not think about having a modified radical mastectomy at that moment. I could not believe the words coming out of my mouth were saying “no” to surgery. My mind began to wander. My thoughts to God were, “God, I wanted to learn more about cancer but not this way!”

I couldn’t think of anyone I knew that had cancer that I could talk to at that moment. I knew I had read of research and new techniques in breast cancer that I wanted to explore, so I decided to get a second opinion. He agreed that would be wise and he would make an appointment for me in Wichita. The surgeon said he would call Friday morning with more information about my type of cancer. Rodney and I agreed not to tell anyone until we knew more.

The surgeon called Friday morning before I had to leave to help with a funeral service thirty-five miles away. I didn’t understand the terms he used except for “your cancer is a very aggressive type and I don’t want you to waste any time. I have scheduled you for surgery Tuesday morning. Your second opinion appointment will be Monday at 4:00 p.m. in Wichita.” When I hung up the phone, the surgeon had scared me enough that I believed that I was going to die! I had looked forward to the year 2000 as a fresh beginning for myself. Now, I really believed I was not going to have my fiftieth birthday and my thirtieth wedding anniversary in September!

I told God that I was ready to go but I really wanted to live much longer than fifty years. I wanted to be here for Rodney and our two children, Jarrod and Audra. Also I wanted to be there for all my nieces and nephews, my aunt and uncle, and my mother-in-law. I was determined to learn and fight for my life. We decided we didn’t have enough time to personally tell our children or my sister in Iowa. I hated to call and give them this report over the telephone, but did. I believe it was so much harder to tell the ones we loved than being told that I had breast cancer.

We drove to Wichita Sunday afternoon after work. As soon as we checked into the motel I found the phone book. I looked up the doctor’s name that I was supposed to see the next day. I was so disappointed when I saw that he was only a surgeon and wasn’t listed under Oncology. I explained to Rodney: “This isn’t who I want, he’s a surgeon, and of course he’s going to say I have to have surgery. I want someone who knows cancer, has experience with cancer every day and knows what is happening in the cancer world!” Rodney then replied: “Remember your Uncle Howard telling us if he ever got cancer that he was going to Tulsa?” That was the answer I needed!

My uncle’s nephew and his wife, plus their daughter, a daughter-in-law, and a cousin had been treated at Cancer Treatment Centers of America (CTCA) at Southwestern Regional Medical Center in Tulsa, Oklahoma. I called Betty for her advice and for information on the cancer center.

Betty advised me not to have any chemotherapy or radiation treatments in western Kansas. She personally knew of ones that had not received their treatments correctly and/or had come to CTCA too late. Betty said if she had to do it all over again, she would have had her surgery at Southwestern also. She told me about nutrition, supplements and about treating the whole person. That was great, but at this time all I cared about was finding the most knowledgeable oncologist in America!

I awoke early Monday morning watching and waiting for the clock to show 8:00 a.m. They answered the phone a few minutes before eight! Rodney and I spoke that morning to both Pattie and Sharon, Oncology Information Specialists. They could tell that we were anxious and asked us to give them time to make arrangements to come to Tulsa. They were very understanding and so knowledgeable it gave us an excellent first impression of the hospital. In a few hours they called us and said, “Come to Tulsa. We have an appointment for you tomorrow to see Dr. Greeff.”

Rodney headed down the interstate like he was driving to an emergency. I think that it was his first feeling that we were finally headed in the right direction and couldn’t wait to get there to save me. One thing that I wanted to do for our family was to have our picture taken even though I knew it would be very hard to smile. On Tuesday morning we found a photographer that just happened to have time to take our pictures before the appointment at CTCA.

Entering the doors of the hospital, a peace and comfort seemed to surround me even though I believe everything seemed so overwhelming. Everyone was so friendly, kind, and helpful not only to Rodney and I but to their fellow co-workers. I met Joyce, in case management, who began to comfort us by telling how wonderful and experienced the doctors were. We were handed a notebook, which impressed on me how thought-out, organized and helpful CTCA was in guiding their patients.

We were warmly greeted and welcomed by Dr. Greeff’s nurse, Marge. Dr. Greeff looked at the films we had brought with us. He then listened to our concerns and answered all of our questions. He asked to have more testing done and ordered scans. Tests that I hadn’t even thought about though I had already been told there was a possibility that my cancer could be elsewhere through my body. Also, I met Dr. Flynn and other oncologists.

I thought it was a great suggestion when my doctor said that all of us, meaning doctors, their nurses, and my family would gather together to talk about my test results. In that meeting, I was told that the cancer was only in my breast and lymph nodes. We cried tears of joy and relief, and I was so thankful to God for protecting me from the worst.

Then we discussed the possible ways I could be treated. Dr. Greeff said, “Now, we need to know what you are feeling down deep in your soul. What do you feel is the right treatment for you?” At that very moment, the decision seem to be so right and very clear that I should start chemotherapy first to begin killing the cancer cells traveling throughout my blood stream. I did question myself to be sure I wasn’t being selfish or wrong because I didn’t want to have surgery at this time. I was sure because medically it made sense and I did feel very positive about my decision. For the first time since being told that I had cancer, I believed I was going to live! God had answered my prayers, which led me to the right doctors and the right treatment center.

I started chemo on Friday, nine days after learning I had cancer. I received six to seven hours of three kinds of chemo for five days. I remember a doctor saying that it might shrink maybe 1 to 5 percent but by the end of four months, my large tumor had shrunk around 50 percent!

Through my nights of treatments, I would play a game in my mind that my children loved to play when they were little, Pac-man. I would imagine as the chemo was flowing though my body, it was eating up all of the bad cancer cells. I heard later from other patients that they too had done the same. Rodney stayed with me though each treatment until I could convince him he should go to bed. The guest rooms were so convenient! He would leave the door unlocked for me to arrive around 4:00 a.m.

My fifth month was the month I had surgery. The chemotherapy had done a marvelous job of shrinking my tumors, which I believe made my surgery much safer for me. After surgery is when I actually learned more about my cancer. It was an infiltrating duct carcinoma, grade 3, nuclear grade 3, with squamous and metaplastic carcinoma, estrogen negative and progesterone positive, and one (metastatic adenocarcinoma) of the eight lymph nodes found had cancer.

I healed very quickly and started my radiation in August, twice a day for seven weeks. The weeks spent in the cancer center probably were some of the best days of my life. During this time, I met some of my dearest friends, friendships that mean so much to my survival and me. The cafeteria was more than just serving great meals filled with nutrition. It was where we would meet the new and the returning patients.

I loved to hear about their stories of finding CTCA, about their families and about their cancer and concerns. It was where we learned, supported and encouraged each other. There I realized that I wasn’t the only one with chemo brain and also felt blessed that I had only breast cancer. We also checked on each other when we knew one was having a bad day or week. This atmosphere gave Rodney a peace of mind knowing that everything I needed was there and I was safe when he couldn’t be there all the time.

During those weeks I learned and enjoyed the many classes offered by the many departments. Oh yes, the “Most Important Meeting Of The Week” showed me why and how everything medically and professionally ran so smooth. I was happy to find the Fitting Room and Jacque’s TLC Salon conveniently located in the building. The first time I had heard of Pain Management was at CTCA. I had never experienced pain before but the pain management team really helped me through some painful months that I hadn’t expected.

Jokingly, but with some truth, patients compared CTCA to a resort or spa. Also, we talked among ourselves about how we had never seen or been around so many happy sick people! But then there were times we had to accept the fact that God was calling a dear loving friend home, it was time to pray and to comfort their family the best we could.

I still think of those special visits and miss them very much. It was great to be around so many positive people! Doctors that really cared about each individual patient that would sit down, look you in the eye, hug you and know that they and God were a team to help heal your cancer. In the middle of my radiation on Labor Day weekend, I celebrated my fiftieth birthday and our thirtieth wedding anniversary in Branson with my sister and family.

I ended my treatment with three more months of chemo, which I finished at the first of 2001. The last three months were the hardest treatments for me but I was determined to make it through so I will never have to fight a battle of cancer again.

I don’t know the cause of my cancer. I do know that CTCA has taught me a lot about cancer and how to fight cancer. I have just traveled down a new road in my life for some special purpose. Maybe it is to help and direct my friends, family, and even the frightened stranger on the other end of the phone. I am happy to say that I have led five new patients to Southwestern and one new patient to Midwestern Regional Medical Center in Zion, Illinois.

I give those that ask for information Cancer Treatment Centers of America’s toll free number and tell them that an Oncology Information Specialist can answer any question. I also advise them not to waste time but don’t be afraid to learn as much as possible about their cancer so they can make sensible decisions. If their doctor doesn’t take time to look them in the eye, listen and answer all their questions, find a doctor that cares.

If you have cancer, go to an oncologist; go where they fight to heal all kinds of cancer every day of the week. We have to take control for ourselves because God has given us only one life to live! In my case, I believe that if I had my surgery first and had not heard of Cancer Treatment Centers of America, I would not be here today.

I was always surrounded with Rodney’s love and help, along with other family and friends. Thank you to all the wonderful departments, my loving caseworker, Darlene, the caring staff and doctors for guiding me through my battle against cancer. Thanks to God for leading Rodney and I to Cancer Treatment Centers of America.